Understanding the Idealize-Devalue-Discard Cycle:

A Pattern, Not Personal Failure

If a relationship once felt like a dream—intense admiration, feeling truly seen and chosen—only to spiral into doubt, criticism, distance, and abrupt endings that left you reeling, you’re likely familiar with the idealize–devalue–discard cycle.

I want to say this plainly and gently: this isn’t random chaos, and it isn’t proof you weren’t “enough.” It’s a